Magic, really

Magic is a tool for some and a lifestyle for others. Some use it as needed, others live under its veil and view every action, thought, and gesture as some sort of magical happening. I’m the former.
Magic is not hocus-pocus, wands and chalices and this and that. Magic, if it had to be categorized, would fall into the fields of psychology and communication. In order to perform magic, you have to convince yourself that you have the power to engender change and direct influence over circumstance and others. Magic is a product of specialized language and (usually) self-directed psychological guidance.
Therapy is a form of applied magic, in my opinion. The witch (the shrink) uses learned skills (psychology) and specialized language (communication) in order to get past the target’s (client’s) mental defenses and locate a problem. The witch then uses his or her knowledge to help that person get better by giving advice or helping the client realize his or her own power to change his or her situation.
Magic is about changing your mental state to bring yourself higher either materialistically or spiritually. If you are depressed, magic is the process by which you gather enough goodwill toward the future, or hope—you’re changing your mind and the way you see things in order to ensure a better life. A love spell is about the equivalent of realizing you like someone, psyching yourself up, and then using that confidence to talk to the object of your desire. And because confidence is so important, it’s looked at as a very big necessity.
I dunno—I think I just like using the connotation of magic in order to explain everyday things because there’s a certain glory in being able to proclaim yourself a witch that appeals to me. But anyway, a parallel is a parallel and the one I have sure makes my days much more enjoyable.

The Revelution

I think I'm a part of a revolution now. I went to a leadership conference on Friday and came back today with the knowledge that stuff has got to change. Well, I actually already knew that stuff had to change, but I mean stuff has to change NOW. Disparities in social justice, health care, education--so many issues need addressing and so many coalitions need building. I found myself leading a few discussions, and while I admit it was kind of scary, it was also very exhilarating. It made me feel like stuff could happen--so many leaders in one place!! Now if we can just connect...

It's all so much and so sudden; I'll elaborate more later.

A Rundown

So this is my first post… A bit about me, I guess.
My name is Juan and I’m comfortable telling you this because my name is so popular that the chances a creeper will find me are slim to none. I’m from a big city on the east coast, but I go to school in a tiny town in the Midwest. Sexually, I prefer males, but am comfortable being romantically involved with women, though I prefer to keep it to a minimum due to the amount of complications that would arise when I tell said woman to keep her shirt on after the date. I struggle with a condition where I think a lot about my thinking and my actions—some call it deep thinking; I call it annoying.
But that’s what the blog is about: Deep thinking and the isolation that arises from it.
I’m unapologetically social—I wave to everyone I see on campus, I talk to people whether or not I know them (this only gets better when I’ve had a drink), and I have the best friends anyone could have ever! If ever I need a lunch buddy, someone is just a dial away. If I cannot get in touch via phone, chances normally dictate that I will see someone I know well enough to eat with in the cafeteria. And closer to my heart are my best friends—the ones I love and cherish and think of always. In my group of friends, I'm typically the crone-character (sort of like the grandparent who steps in when the parent-character), though when the "mommy" has everything under control I can afford to be childish and a handful. I'm somewhat popular, given that people know me by name and can connect that name with my face most of the time. I’m hardly a loner.

And yet, somehow, I’m the loneliest individual I know.

So let's recap
Name: Juan Lopez (Jua-Lo lol)
Age: 19
Gender: Male
Orientation: Gay
Spirituality: I guess it would be considered a form of paganism if it had to have a name, but it includes tributes to my ancestors, acknowledgment of equality between the high and the low, acknowledgment of my divinity and the divinity of every living being, and the practice of psychological/social/communication-based "magic."
External traits: Outgoing, extroverted, social, caring
Internal traits: Fatalistic(ish), deterministic(ish), mothering, vengeful, somewhat utterly lonely